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  • Autism

    #1
    Has anyone here been diagnosed with autism, and if so, could you share your experiences and how Minecraft has helped you?
     

    KariKittyx

    Admin
    Staff member
    Admin
    #2
    To start things off, I think this could be a really interesting thread but I understand it can be scary for some. Online "Autism" is used as an insult a lot, and honestly has no reason to be one. Never be afraid of who you are, because you are amazing.

    I was diagnosed around August-October of 2016 at the age of 17 with high functioning Autism, meaning I basically fell into all parts of the spectrum. Until then, I'd been playing Minecraft since the age of 13. It was my gateway to actually meeting people, having friends and other games. Gaming has and always will be my escape from the real world, but it's not always fun.
    As I mentioned, "autism" is used as an insult but honestly... They obviously don't understand what Autism is, and they don't define you. You aren't one word, you're a million other amazing things. You're whatever you want to be. I spent my whole life thinking something was wrong with me, and that I'd never fit in. Until I got that diagnosis I was never taken seriously, like I was making it all up. For some, they feel like the diagnosis will make them worse. Like because of the stigma, they will be "broken" or "worthless", but for me? It opened my life up to so many things.

    At 13 I was basically an illegal drop out, my school attendance was 4% and dropping. Minecraft helped me escape that jail I'd put myself into, and was there for me in the ongoing battle I faced for years afterward. Even after taking breaks, even from Momento, I also found myself coming back when times got tough. It's a safe place, and it's home. I dropped out of college back when I first joined Momento, and just never went back. After the diagnosis, I was accepted into a more accepting college of sorts which caters specifically for people on the Autistic spectrum. My diagnosis came after 6 suicide attempts in one year, and frankly, it saved my life.

    Both Minecraft and my diagnosis have impacted my life greatly, and will forever help me grow. Autism will not hold me back, it will help me move forward. Minecraft has spurred my love for game development, and also will help me to grow not only as a person but help me decide my future.
    Just because I have Autism, doesn't mean I am only someone with Autism. I am a human, and friend. A daughter, and a sister. I am me, and that's all anyone can wish to be.

    Love you all, Kari.
     
    #3
    To start things off, I think this could be a really interesting thread but I understand it can be scary for some. Online "Autism" is used as an insult a lot, and honestly has no reason to be one. Never be afraid of who you are, because you are amazing.

    I was diagnosed around August-October of 2016 at the age of 17 with high functioning Autism, meaning I basically fell into all parts of the spectrum. Until then, I'd been playing Minecraft since the age of 13. It was my gateway to actually meeting people, having friends and other games. Gaming has and always will be my escape from the real world, but it's not always fun.
    As I mentioned, "autism" is used as an insult but honestly... They obviously don't understand what Autism is, and they don't define you. You aren't one word, you're a million other amazing things. You're whatever you want to be. I spent my whole life thinking something was wrong with me, and that I'd never fit in. Until I got that diagnosis I was never taken seriously, like I was making it all up. For some, they feel like the diagnosis will make them worse. Like because of the stigma, they will be "broken" or "worthless", but for me? It opened my life up to so many things.

    At 13 I was basically an illegal drop out, my school attendance was 4% and dropping. Minecraft helped me escape that jail I'd put myself into, and was there for me in the ongoing battle I faced for years afterward. Even after taking breaks, even from Momento, I also found myself coming back when times got tough. It's a safe place, and it's home. I dropped out of college back when I first joined Momento, and just never went back. After the diagnosis, I was accepted into a more accepting college of sorts which caters specifically for people on the Autistic spectrum. My diagnosis came after 6 suicide attempts in one year, and frankly, it saved my life.

    Both Minecraft and my diagnosis have impacted my life greatly, and will forever help me grow. Autism will not hold me back, it will help me move forward. Minecraft has spurred my love for game development, and also will help me to grow not only as a person but help me decide my future.
    Just because I have Autism, doesn't mean I am only someone with Autism. I am a human, and friend. A daughter, and a sister. I am me, and that's all anyone can wish to be.

    Love you all, Kari.
    Thank you for sharing your experience. I too have struggled with Autism. I had no friends, and no-one to talk to. My diagnosis happened too late, as by the time everything in school had started to be implemented to help me, I was kicked out after I had lashed out multiple times by a group of people who knew that they could easily wind me up. The school that I went to was a private school, so they didnt have many people who had problems such as I had. I have since moved to a better School, where I have made friends, and now actually enjoy school, due to the support that I get now. Minecraft has been a safe area where I can just play, and just ignore the problems in my life. I obviously haven’t had the same level of problems as you have, and reading your story nearly made me tear up. You are an inspiration to the community, and again, thank you for sharing your story. Keep on doing what you love and stay true to yourself.

    Alex
    XKillerBD
     

    Activentor

    Formerly known as 0eroTimesNow
    #4
    My experience with this is I having no friends. It's like when I have no friends, I feel lonely (I am currently lonely right now, and hurt). Minecraft did help me when I started playing Minecraft since version 1.4.7 (I don't remember the date of the version being released), but after a while, it started becoming worse. People were starting to be rude to me, saying hurtful things about me, and other stuff. I just wanted to make some friends, but they keep on failing. And I am thinking to myself, 'What is wrong with me?', 'What did I do wrong?'. These things have been with me for 2 years now, and they never go away, even if I try to put it aside. And it's like everyday I would have a negative behavior, and start acting like a bad person, even when I am trying to put this in the trash bin. But I realized that acting like this is going to make yourself look worse, and no one will like me, so that's what I did, and I started talking with my friends more, and started playing Basketball with my friends so that I can look like a perfect person. But the autism is still in my head right now, and even when I was a staff member here, it was hurting me, and that was why I wouldn't chat much during the time I was a staff member. And a little message to the staff team, I am very sorry for what I have done. I knew what I did was wrong, and I realized that applying was a huge mistake. But now I have learnt my lesson, and won't do it again.

    All of this that I put may not make sense, but that's all I can put.

    Thank you for understanding and supporting me! (especially to my friends)

    Edit: I hope that I can be a respected person as I respect you back
     
    Last edited:
    #5
    My experience with this is I having no friends. It's like when I have no friends, I feel lonely (I am currently lonely right now, and hurt). Minecraft did help me when I started playing Minecraft since version 1.4.7 (I don't remember the date of the version being released), but after a while, it started becoming worse. People were starting to be rude to me, saying hurtful things about me, and other stuff. I just wanted to make some friends, but they keep on failing. And I am thinking to myself, 'What is wrong with me?', 'What did I do wrong?'. These things have been with me for 2 years now, and they never go away, even if I try to put it aside. And it's like everyday I would have a negative behavior, and start acting like a bad person, even when I am trying to put this in the trash bin. But I realized that acting like this is going to make yourself look worse, and no one will like me, so that's what I did, and I started talking with my friends more, and started playing Basketball with my friends so that I can look like a perfect person. But the autism is still in my head right now, and even when I was a staff member here, it was hurting me, and that was why I wouldn't chat much during the time I was a staff member. And a little message to the staff team, I am very sorry for what I have done. I knew what I did was wrong, and I realized that applying was a huge mistake. But now I have learnt my lesson, and won't do it again.

    All of this that I put may not make sense, but that's all I can put.

    Thank you for understanding and supporting me! (especially to my friends)

    Edit: I hope that I can be a respected person as I respect you back
    Sorry I didnt reply earlier, but thank you so much for sharing your experience with me. This means a lot to me. Keep up the good work, and I hope that wencan talk again or meet ingame.

    Alex
    XKillerBD
     

    Vile_Moon

    Active Member
    Retired
    #6
    The input I have is not autism, however it relates in the way of dealing with a struggle. This is relating to my son, who is now 6 and in the first grade. When he was born we, being new parents, didn't check a few things when some issues starting arising. Struggles and difficulties lasted until he went in for his 4 year checkup and we found out he was severely tongue tied; this impacted his ability to nurse and, worse still, his language development. Verbally he was on the speech level of a 2-3 year old instead of kids his same age group. This started the issues when he entered public Kindergarten and was having massive difficulties communicating with other children. Those issues resulted in him lashing out physically, because nobody could understand him verbally, and treated him different since they couldn't figure out what he was trying to say. He's now in speech therapy to try and get caught up to where he should have been for two, or more, years now. As his speech improved, however, the frequency of his issues remained the same and, in some cases, only got worse. Initially my wife and I thought he was just being a little shithead. My wife and I spent many nights wondering what we could do, what we failed to do, and actively wondering if we had failed as parents and raised a shitty child, as far as his behavior was concerned.

    Flash back, with all that still in mind, to about the beginning of August when we did some of our own research, had a lengthy conversation with his teacher, then eventually his doctor. After some documentation and assessments were completed and reviewed by his doctor, we found out that he officially has ADHD. A little more research into his particular 'type' of ADHD revealed the cause of all his behavioral and learning issues up to this point. Suddenly my wife and I felt horrible about all the punishments we'd dealt out that, as parents, we hoped would correct his behavioral problems. Suddenly, we understood what was happening and why he was acting this way. When we'd get a report that he had hit someone in school and we asked him about it he would almost always answer with "I don't know." As a parent, when I ask my son "Why did you hit someone today?" and he says he doesn't know? That answer is unacceptable, that behavior unacceptable, and appropriate punishment would be given as soon as we got home. With his ADHD diagnosis we suddenly saw the light and realized that when he said "I don't know" he meant it; there are moments when he has absolutely no impulse control and randomly does things, such as throwing a toy or touching someone, aggressively or not.

    All that to get to the point that I, from the position of a parent, fully understand the struggle of not fitting in, not knowing what's going on internally or externally, and why people look at you differently. I have never been in your shoes, but I am trying to raise someone wearing a similar pair. From me you have support, encouragement, and someone to vent to if you feel like nobody else is listening.
     

    Liezexo

    Helper
    Staff member
    Helper
    #7
    Last year I started watching this show, concerning autism, called Atypical, it's 2nd season recently came out. You might know it, you might not. Personally, I think it represents the case pretty well, I myself don't have it, but I've been around someone on the spectrum for around 5-6 years.

    At the start of high school, I was kind of finding my way around and noticed this guy, called Noa, acting a bit off, behaviour wise. For two years I just wondered and thought of him as weird, eventually, after I got to know him a bit, I discovered he had been diagnosed with autism. As far as I knew, he'd just lash out at people at random times or run out of rooms all of a sudden, yelling, etc. I didn't really know what to think of it, except for a bad childhood or a difficult home situation. Unfortunately, not a lot of people know about these type of things and don't recognize it easily, myself included. Even with the knowledge of his condition, I still didn't really understand how it all worked or how he felt, I tried to figure out with Google, but nothing really explained it as good as I wanted it explained. Ever since I found out, I simply wanted to help him and be there for him, so that's what I tried to do, but it was harder than expected. He didn't really have a knack for social encounters, figures, right? He'd yell at me, lash out a lot, simply walk away as well. I didn't give up though, I messaged one of his friends asking about all of it and eventually got to talking with Noa himself. To my honest surprise, he was very mature, very smart even, just not the best at social interaction, I had to learn how to not "trigger" some reactions, to which he were very sensitive. Over those next 3-4years, I got to know him pretty well and learned a lot of new things, I've stuck up for him in situations and been a part-time therapist at times, which helped me understand more how he felt, how people with autism felt. I was happy that I could be a figure that he'd be comfortable around, it helped both me and him. I was with him on his first dinner out with a small group of friends, which he had never done at the age of 17 and to be honest, I was proud of him. Might be a small thing to some, but it was a big accomplishment in our eyes. I haven't really had too much contact with him this year, but from what I've heard, he's doing great and that makes me happy.

    After all, if you don't really know much about this and/or feel the urge to learn something more or are someone with Autism looking for something to relate to, go watch the series, I really recommend it. It has opened doors for some people, no doubt it has also opened some peoples' eyes.
    Sam is the main character, he's a strong-minded boy on the spectrum and I honestly admire him, even though he's a character, he's well portrayed. The series kind of shows how a day in the life can be, how difficult and unexpected things tend to happen, how dangerous it can be for some and why they can use the help. As well as why you can't just jump to conclusions about people, they might have it more difficult than you'd expect and they're not always to blame for their behaviour, some cases are more severe than others.
    If you're thinking something along the lines of "Isn't everyone on the spectrum?," or "Doesn't everyone have autistic traits?," feel free to read this small article, here, since I have wondered this myself.

    On a side note: I support and respect everyone that has shared their story above as well as all of the people reading this, if you need a listening ear, I'll be at your disposal.
     

    Maartxo

    Well-Known Member
    #8
    Hi hi, it's me again, decided to post again because, in my last post (which I deleted because I shared things which were way too personal and I regret posting), I wasn't honest in the beginning. I actually do have autism and a few people had a really deep conversation on Discord and Kari told me about this thread that I forgot about and I decided that it was time for me to post again (which was allowed even though this thread is very old and inactive). I was diagnosed when I was about 5-6. I have Aspergers and struggle with sensory overload and hypersensitivity. I have difficulties on a lot of levels, one being interpreting verbal and non-verbal language when it comes to social interactions. If a friend of mine is sad, all other people will instantly know, I tend to have a lot of difficulties noticing that.
    When I have a problem, instead of """bothering""" others with it, I keep it to myself. I always feel like I'm throwing my problems onto other people whenever I share something, I'm scared that I'm "involving" them in the problem. I don't want to be a burden to them. And this has caused me a lot of difficulty with being open about my feelings.
    Another thing is that I, to quote a website I found, desire sameness. I have my whole day planned out, I find it hard to not follow a schedule. My family always eats dinner at 17:45, and whenever guests are over or my parents are somewhere and they come home a bit later, we eat later, and even though it sometimes is just 15 minutes later, it feels wrong. This summer break, I ate breakfast at exactly 9:14 EVERY morning, I didn't skip a day, except one, I slept 'til 10:40 because I was so tired the previous day, and when I woke up and looked at the time and realised that I missed breakfast, it almost felt wrong to eat.
    My biggest struggle is my hypersensitivity/ sensory overload. I suppose most of you know what it is, if you don't, google it. It is mostly a problem in school. My grades are being affected by this problem, but luckily I can always talk to teachers and arrange things so that I can be comfortable.
    I could go on and on but I don't think that anyone wants to read that.

    Now the question was how did Minecraft help, and I'll tell you: I started playing Minecraft when I was 7 and a bit, and I used to play in singleplayer. What I loved about singleplayer is that I could control everything, most of my fears come from the fact that I have no control, like planes. I had full control over everything, even the day/night (commands, beds), it was adjustable to my desires. When I got to multiplayer, it was hard for me, but there was one thing that made me join every day - at exactly 16:00 - and that was the player base (I started playing multiplayer around age 10, by the way). I made friends and talked a lot, and it really helped me, since I struggled a lot with interactions in school because of my autism. When I first joined the creative server that later became Momento Creative, I met a few people, we would chat each day, and it would make me so happy. When Momento and that independent creative server merged, I met these new people when I started to explore prison, which was kind of out of my comfort zone, since I was so used to creative, where I could control, ya know? I still talk to some people these days, and they're always here for support whenever I need them. Minecraft was a way for me to cope with my social anxiety (which is also part of my autism) and it has helped me to come out of my shell.

    Nowadays, at age 15, I have a lot of real-life, supportive and beautiful friends who motivate me to be who I truly am, because they love me for me, and that was a big problem: Not loving myself for who I was.

    Thank you Minecraft, thank you independent creative server that I will not say the name of, thank you Momento. Thank you all. You have shaped me into the person I am today. Who knows, maybe if I never started playing Minecraft, I'd be home all-day stuck in my room.


    I just want to say that everyone struggles with things differently. You may have different symptoms as I do, but it doesn't mean that you're struggling less. I don't want to sound cheesy but you can make someone's day by just saying hello to them, or giving them a simple compliment like 'I like your hair'. My friends have learned that by giving me simple compliments, my whole day becomes perfect. If you know someone who may be down and/or struggling, just say hi or give them a compliment. Trust me, many people don't know the effectiveness of simple things like that.


    To all the people that struggle with things like Autism, or things nothing like Autism. You're amazing. You're doing amazing. Keep on doing amazing. You rock.